you are ok

Hello darlings.

Today I write from the heart. This blog has a lot of different aspects to it. I don't get paid to advertise which allows me to have a little more freedom to be me. Today I thought it would be relevant to talk about being ok.

I posted on instagram a video of me bopping around dancing. Do you feel like you are luke warm and just bopping through life at times? It happens, and sometimes it can take years to feel ok with whatever situation you were given.  I do believe challenges are what make us unique human beings. Experiences give us more gratitude and awareness of what we have and what we have been given. There are so many different stories I could share on here, however my health as been a huge part of my 30's and now that I turned 40 I feel the need to express it and be there for others if they face similar challenges.

I am going to be ok. I had a wonderful pregnancy and it was easy. I had a horrible delivery that lasted 32 hours with a c-section and lots of fear. I was in the hospital for a week after with a baby who didn't sleep and a hubby who thought what in the world just happened?!! Our daughter was born independent and really felt sleeping was for babies...not her. The first year consisted of a sleepless whirlwind and gratitude that my body was ok. Fast forward to a couple years later as we decided it was time to shoot for another one, and life became a series of endless bopping around for years.

I had three surgeries and too many exams to count after we decided for baby number two. The hardest surgery was my abdominal hysterecomy at the age of 34. I have a scar from my c-section and a scar right above it from the hysterectomy. Both scars remind me of my adorable kids. I believe God works in so many incredible ways. For me, I had to have the traumatic c-section to give birth to my daughter or she would not be here. For my son, I know the hysterectomy gave me the faith to choose adoption and he would not be with me today without that challenge. It breaks my heart to think of him not in our lives and the lack of faith I would have had if it were not for certain challenges.

I am ok. You are ok. It might be your relationship, your child, your health, a death, a job and so on. I believe we are here on this earth for such a short time that I must make the best of it, even if it isn't what I want. People experience trauma that is beyond what our brains can even comprehend. I am filled with joy when I hear of humans who take their experience and use it for good. We all can learn from others and we are all going to be ok.

Happy Spring Darlings,

xo jennifer